Once more I am lost. It's my fault . I should have learned. I did learn the hardest way possible in my previous life but somehow the lesson learned didn't stay in place. I met a lovely man.
The simple truth is that we fell in love. Against all the odds I met a man I loved dearly.
I am clearly destined to end my life alone. I see that now so I can do this. But Michael and I had wrapped our lives around each other.
We talked every day, several times a day on the phone. We followed all the breaking news stories, seldom agreeing on anything but never fell out.
We cruised together in great joy and harmony. We visited each other's homes when we were not out and about.
We made our plans to fit in with each other . We were careful of each other's feelings and shared everything.
He it was who booked our next cruise whilst I was out, taking a service. He was delighted to have found one that he knew we would both enjoy. "Separate cabins" he announced...."But next to each other"
He died yesterday.
So I am back to trudging around the house and garden....it's a path I take far too often!
Since writing that small things have restored some of my faith.
A bunch of flowers on my door step, some gingerbread in a packet...kind messages...
I've walked this path, carrying my grief before, too often...but I am grateful for the kind words...
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