Saturday, 24 March 2012

Working off anger.


I am having an angry day. This is most unusual. It makes it worse that though I am very angry indeed I can't actually discuss it with anyone outside the home, though the dog's ear has been bent quite a lot and David has given me several scenarios to work on in order to dissipate the anger.
He and the dog have now taken up their separate positions, one in the summer house and the other in the garden.
I can't say what has made me angry apart from being very let down by someone I trusted. It's not sudden...it's been growing steadily since my return home.
I know I should simply have it out, discuss it, talk around it but I don't trust myself to be reasonable now...I've let it get too far for that.
When the first David died I had tremendous anger, both with him for dying and with God for letting him.
I got rid of that anger by shouting a lot on deserted beaches.
I can't do that anymore. So dear diary I am shouting at you instead....you can take it!
We all have a wobble from time to time....most of mine are momentary but I am having difficulty shaking this one off.
Arghhhhh!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

3 comments:

  1. I think anger based on hurt is the hardest of all to conquer.
    For me, writing it down (and if it is of a too private nature) scrapping it after reading it aloud a few times helps to dissipate the fiercest edge of it.
    Blogging is useful too, but if you have to edit it too much it loses its value.
    At least you have one person to whom you can offload some of it, though of course, sometimes it can be the one and only other person in your life who is at the root of the fury.
    It might be useful to have somewhere where you can safely throw something heavy, or making a racket bashing something noisy.
    Anything is better than squirreling it away and letting it become toxic.

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  2. You are right Ray as always...I have walked much farther than usual....thats an excellent way for me... Its still there but hopefully not going toxic!

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  3. Jean [*] was my first reaction.

    The problem for me with anger is whether or not it serves any purpose, apart from me letting of steam. I've found that bottling it up doesn't help me or anyone else, but I need to do something, like your long walk, to undo the pressure valve slowly, letting the steam evaporate as a slower, cooler stream of water (so to speak).

    As Ray says, I also use supplication in prayer and I write it down in my personal journal, one I only share with my SD. He is the safe place that I can take it to and to lay it out for him to understand, and to comment sensibly on the hurt or whatever has caused it.

    I normally, come away, defused and with an idea of how to tackle the underlying cause. Not in a confrontational way, but hopefully in the light of God's grace. I need to tackle it rather than as you've mention above allowing it to become toxic.

    If it is just petty anger, such as shouting at an inconsiderate driver, normally that is sufficient to release the steam.

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