Monday, 25 November 2013

A new way of life.

I can republish this now I've posted the last one!
We wake up very early these dark days. The man next to me in bed is not my husband....instead a very round face tries to smile, tries to remember what day it is and occasionally succeeds.
Last night he broke a bottle of red wine and tried to mop it up with a tea towel.....glass everywhere.....some in our fingers.
He does know who I am but I'm not quite sure who he is most of the time.
The steroids have given him his facial contours. The brain struggles to come to terms with what ever the day throws at us and he is often still my old dear David but I can't rely on him being there some of the time.....
We go from day to day waiting to see what happens next....
Some of the time he's frightened. Sometimes I'm frightened.....
We weep together....we laugh together too....To stay miserable is not our normal way of life but just now nothing is normal....
The new territory we are exploring together is strange, sometimes frightening, occasionally funny.....but we are doing it together....I don't leave him on his own in case he panics.....we will face whatever lies ahead together....
It is the fear of the unknown which is the hardest bit.....we have never been here before....it's new ground for us....but we move on hand in hand. Lord hear our prayer !

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