David's time in the nursing home has opened my eyes in lots of directions.
In Essex I went on the course for volunteers to become lay accessors of people's homes. We accompanied fully trained people and I often worked with the same man. We worked out a plan. Some matrons talked to us in their office. This could take a morning and did not need two of us. After about an hour I would ask to use the loo. Someone would take me and afterwards I would "get lost"
It gave me time on my own to explore, to talk to the staff as well as the patients....I got a lot of information that way. It was not all good. One of the carers ended up in prison as a result of what we found.
Mostly though it was routine stuff, size of rooms, number of people sharing facilities...
The staff of these homes varied from gentle and caring to rough and impatient. There was a common sentence to cover staff problems.
"If you pay peanuts you get monkeys"
Yesterday I arrived early to see David and found my husbands room apparently empty, the bed made and the chairs looking out to sea. Momentary panic hit me and then I heard a sound. It was a gentle voice reassuring my other half.
He was in the bathroom unable to move....a young girl was helping him. She talked as she did it in gentle loving tones, encouraging him all the while. He was gasping for breath with the effort of trying to get his limbs in the right place. Neither knew I was there and I was reluctant to open the door on what was a kind, intimate manoeuvre . She got him moving and I revealed my presence, not wanting to startle them.
I now know the old saying is not true.
If you pay peanuts you can get angels!