Wednesday, 19 February 2014

Days end.

Today, the day of David's funeral has been harrowing but also quite extraordinary...

People arrived from far afield, some arrived, attended the service and drove back up country straight away. Many were old friends of us both , a lot were from my old parish, it was an amazing day.

One man had come because he read my blog! Some people, friends of David told afterwards the stories of his rowing days as well as his time building large structures and roads...

My colleague made the service beautiful, the organist played exactly as David had asked him too at a previous funeral..

The local Catholic priest arrived at my home between the two services, an old friend was making a pastoral visit!

It was an extraordinary day in every way and then right at the end, sitting with a devout member of the congregation, I told her that I was very cross with God.

She looked at me closely..."God has paid you a massive compliment" she said "He only ever gives us what we can withstand. giving you this death after losing your children he has told you that He knows you can cope"

It's a point of view which helps just a little...but Lord , no more please, no more"



  1. I'm so glad the day went so well Jean. Amazing isn't it how people suddenly come 'out of the woodwork' at a time of bereavement.?
    I've never been sure about the "he only gives you what he knows you can cope with" point of view.
    It does seem monumentally unfair to load some people so very heavily and barely touch others.
    One thing is certain, and that is your very obvious strength.
    I pray you will have all the support and love you will need over the next weeks and months.
    Love and prayers X

  2. Jean! Words fail me - those words of so called consolation seem to me to be unkind and unthinking? But it's been obvious to me from the start that you'd cope, just! through the grief and tears, because your inner strength comes through love for God, for others, especially David, but that strength of faith and trust that shines like a light from you.

    Jesus told us to be salt and light in the world, and for me anyway, you've been both and an inspiration. I just wish that I'd been blessed with the faith and trust that you have.

    And, it's OK to be angry at God - I'm like that quite a lot, but soon know that it's futile and return to the hope that he inspires in me, and that comes back whenever I read your posts. Hope springs eternal in the human heart is an old adage, but it's an honest one.

    Prayers and {{{Hugs} (virtual ones that is) will be ongoing from here. xx

  3. Glad the day went well. Not sure how I would cope with such a remark at such a time - you are very gracious. I've heard the idea that 'God doesn't send you more than you can cope with' loads of times and I'm never sure what it means, because I don't understand why suffering happens at all but I am sure God doesn't 'send' it.

    I do know God can give people strength to get through, you are a shining example of how faith operates in adversity. And I join in your prayer to God - 'No more, please Lord, no more'.