Weird things happen during a period of bereavement. I am still waking very early in the morning but I have slept which is better than I did the last time!
I am also eating but with very tiny portions...food is mostly irrelevant and I am doing no cooking at all. I loved cooking for David and he enjoyed his food a lot , especially his puddings but as there's only me and not even a dog on hand to do the eating up I am buying ready dinners which last over two meal times!
This has had an unexpected result....all my skirts are hitting the ground as I walk.
Waistbands, once snugly in place are now hanging from my hips! I like the lowered hems a lot but have to hoist them up like a Victorian lady at court to get up and down the stairs!
I have adopted several of David's huge sweaters and cardigans. It feels good to wear something he wore but it does mean that in the comfort of my home and garden I have more than a passing resemblance to a bag lady.
I cancelled David's "Times" so I have no idea what's on the TV. It really doesn't matter much at all but today a friend reminded me that I'd missed an episode of " Rev" Thank goodness for the I player.
All of these problems will resolve themselves in time.....sleep, food...no TV , they are all temporary....real life is just around the corner!
I am still wandering around the garden a lot but I have now started pruning things, noticing all the camellias and the bright green buds appearing on everything. I am aware of the beauty all around me which does help .....
The paper work still arrives daily but I am treating it all as a job. I tackle a new problem every day...and I am getting there now....addresses have been changed, direct debits moved to my account, order is slowly occurring where chaos reigned just a short time ago....next month will be even better....
There are bound to be things I've missed....things I've misunderstood but slowly my life is now returning to what will soon be normal. You see there is a God.