One of my oldest friends arrived yesterday. She is ten years older than me and is now quite frail. I usually drive over to my old village to see her but she really needed to do the driving this time.
As I watched her getting into her car I marvelled that she was still able to do most of what she wanted to do. But I still worried about her getting home.
During our conversation the talk inevitably revisited an old topic.
Years ago she and I had agreed that once a terminal diagnosis had been given to either of us we would both take matters into our hands in order to quit.
This is easy to say but much less easy to carry out.
We both believed that it was not anti Christian to opt out of a lingering unpleasant death. We both regretted the failure of the law makers to provide a sensible way out of a debilitating life in extreme circumstances.
My friend is a doctor. Her mind is clear, it's just her body that is frail. We both agreed that our brains were still functioning well but our bodies lacked strength.
It wasn't a gloomy conversation. It didn't sound like two old people desperate to escape....there was a lot of laughter and no self pity.
She has close family though no one local . I haven't.
This means she spends her Christmases with her family.. ...until this year she has driven to Devon where they all live. This year they will pick her up . She isn't pleased with this but I am relieved that this frail old lady will not be driving to the next county!
She understands why I am away at Christmas . It is the solution to my having lost all my nearest and dearest. So yet again I am on the high seas during the festive season this year. Alleluia!
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1 comment:
I suspect that you both share an enormous amount of wisdom and lifes experiences. I would worry about her frailty and driving, but know that sometimes we under estimate the ability that the older generations have to continue to live well, and do things they love.
Not being able to drive for me, would be losing my independence, but I know that my eyesight if getting worse and at some stage, when it can no longer be corrected, I will have to stop.
This makes the urgency of us moving nearer our parish church important, because between that place and us is a very steep hill, which will challenge me getting there in the longer term. I currently take elderly people, unable to drive any more to church and I hope that when it happens, either my younger spouse will drive, or someone will make the offer to take both of us - such charity is a useful ministry opportunity for anyone who can provide this service.
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