Thursday, 31 December 2020
A care home?
Well I am still here...though for how long is questionable. I have never felt so helpless, so at the mercy of things beyond my control.... yesterday I dismantled many of my gimmicky aids to getting onto the internet after being woken up several times a night to be told bad news. My bedroom is now free of extra electronics. As my trusty car started I drove into the village to get food and drink. Hopefully I will do it again. I have though started to wonder if its time to pack it all in. Not suicide of course but an old peoples home has started to look attractive. Just staying alive right now feels enough. Kind people ring me up to see if I am still here and I reassure them that I am but not completely. I look out over Falmouth and see the ships of all sizes still going in and out and remember that every year since my husband died going off on a cruise has been my way of spending Christmas alone. This year that is impossible but the fishing boats are still landing their catches just across the water. I am getting fed up. Thank goodness for the radio and the television. ....sitting at night with a glass of something warming watching rubbish has taken the pl@ce of sailing around the world .But I am trying very hard not to feel sorry for myself. There are many people much worse off than me. But right now the old peoples home in the next village is looking....interesting!
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2 comments:
Good morning Jean. I hope you look into some kind of alternative living. It could be be the start of a new and enjoyable chapter of your life. A retired minister friend of mine who has always been sociable yet independent says moving to sheltered accommodation was a good move. She has company when she needs it, and can shut her front door to the world when she wants!
I look forward to reading about your next steps!
Meanwhile, I wish you all the very best for 2021, May peace, hope and happiness abound!
I come here on New Years Day, to find you contemplating an Old Peoples Home?
Why would you want to give up your freedom of choice for a stay in a place, where nobody could visit you (in the current situation with the virus) and you would be tied to meal times, menu choices etc, having to tell them what you want for three meals, 24 hours in advance, and than be stuck with the choices.
Certainly you would have company, but most residents are confined to their room and social meetups are rare at the moment. You would be isolated with well meaning people, nannying you to make sure you are eating and drinking, tut tutting at your choice of alcoholic beverages and giving you your medication at the same time and checking that you have actually taken it.
In normal times, it might be a good choice, but my experience of residential homes which has been quite extensive over the past few years while visiting people, taking communion to them, highlighted to me, that staying in their own home would have been their preference, not living with people they hadn't previously known. Sure friendships were being made, activities were provided to keep them occupied, but to be honest I can't see you sitting there while Bingo numbers are being called.
You are blessed, although isolated, but it won't last forever. Once vaccination is widespread, you will regain freedom as lockdown measures are lifted and even cruises will eventually resume.
I suspect this is coming across as a bit of a lecture, but I really believe that the Old Peoples Home should be reserved for when you are unable to cope and to take care of yourself, which might be some years yet.
Happy New Year. And prayers for a your well being.
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