I went back to my home church this morning.It's not far away but I don't go often. I started singing in their choir many years ago. Then I became the secretary of the church. As an ordinand I had to pack that in but then I was first a deacon and later priested there.
I know them well. The warmth with which I was greeted was extra ordinary. When I said I was doing the Ash Wednesday service their faces actually lit up.
This puts me in a bad place.
The rule that retiring vicars had to move away is a good one. When I left my first parish and came here I was aware even as it's curate that the ancient priest was still a potent force in the village. When the vicar took early retirement after several months off I was left with the job of running the parish together with my husband the church warden.
The retired priest became positively malevolent before my eyes. He started by interfering with the children's services and more or less prevented what had been a successful All age service from even taking place.
I saw clearly why so many priests in charge had left very quickly after he had broken all the church rules and bought a house here.
And yet it was because they loved him that it could happen and I am all too aware that it might well happen to me in my old parish.
I do not want to become that priest. I am part of the cluster of parishes on the Roseland. I am not often asked to my home parish. I am starting to understand why.
I worry about territorial priests. I could so easily turn into one..
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2 comments:
So much of this resonates with me. The fact that you are aware of what could happen will serve you well; your awareness will prompt you to keep your boundaries.
Jean, I very much imagine that at the point when you stop formally ministering, and even if you opted to camp out under the High Altar, that you couldn't be such a poor force as 'Rev Retired'. I am aware of a rule of etiquette that directs that an outgoing cleric moves from the parish for the duration of their successors tenure. We had one such vicar and wife combo, and they did just that - and returned after that time. Cleric died but wife is now a significant force for good in that parish where her husband had previously ministered.
Equally, I have seen what you have detailed. My mum is a warden in a parish where the last geezer had to be told in fairly strong terms to 'sod off'. He finally did.
As a last thought, (and from one now planning to move), that to remain in a geographic location would be advantageous and alluring even - but for anyone else except an outgoing priest. We are, during our time, the holders of the 'pastoral knowledge', but in the end merely travellers on the road - needing to move on. To retire would have to mean to move too or else you just end up being the unpaid, unvalidated vestige of a ministry that has no strength or discernment to end.
None of the above could or would apply to you; of that I am pretty sure!!!
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