Oh Dear!

Well...NOTHING I had planned has actually worked out this week. linked with that is that yet again nothing feels normal right now. I seem to have made the wrong choices all the way through. The trip that I missed at the beginning of the week is still waiting and I will try again to get all my ducks in a row very soon...but not yet! The truth is that I feel lost just now...nothing feels normal or right..and I have yet to go for the injection I missed ! I am not deliberately avoiding anything...but the lethargy takes over in unexpected ways. The bottom line here is I think that I am just too old. .. nothing feels important enough to get me moving. If I die or catch the infection what does it actually matter? I have no loved ones left! There is literally no one who would miss me...much.And this state of affairs is beginning to colour my thinking now. I havnt tried to start my car all week...and I do usually run it to be sure of it starting when I need it. So.....this is not me at all. And the weather isnt helping! Its cold wet and blowing out there. A day for staying under the duvet in fact but even that feels wrong too! So sorry ...not my usual self at all this morning...but I will try....soon to get all my ducks in a row....What ever that means! Please dont worry if you are reading this...Ill snap out of it when I get moving. Soon!