Monday, 14 June 2021

Living alone !

Twice in the last week I have been let down by people I know well. When I have voiced some anxiety on this score I have been told that its because I am an old woman who gets things wrong. And I know that this is true sometimes...but its not the only reason why someone I trusted has not only done the wrong thing but has tried to make me believe that it was all my fault. This statment was followed by an indication that of course no fault was involved because my age is against me... so I was left wondering if I had actually started to lose it...my brain that is. Only one person has tried to make me feel that my age is the problem...but that has been enough for me to ponder some of my actions and reactions. All I can say after a weekend of considerations is I think I am OK! If thats not true its still OK...As long as I live alone and can keep my my life as it has been since I was widowed . It suits me fine most of the time . ... living alone means theres only me to worry about. So far I am not worrying....but writing this blog every day does help., So we are stuck with it!

1 comment:

UKViewer said...

Who would seriously doubt your veracity?

It was not your fault, it was not due to your age. They are taking advantage of your age and frailty to excuse themselves for what they have done, probably convinced of their invulnerability.

You are seriously sane, your are clear and articulate in your thinking and writing, occasionally we all have lapses of memory, probably mine are similar. I think I have told the story of my turning up for a meeting which had started at 7pm, having convinced myself it was due to start at 8 pm. As I was arriving, everyone was preparing to leave. I was embarrassed, but I think that my being late for things was becoming a bye word for age related forgetfulness. And I won't disabuse those who think it, in case I need that excuse again.

I know that I should learn to rely on my diary, even though I have put the wrong times in there for meetings, now I have learned to check and to recheck times for everything.

I suspect that I get most things right and don't worry when I don't. Unless it is my own funeral, when I expect it will be some body else's responsibility to get me there on time. Don't tell my spouse who relies on me for timings.