A few words heard earlier this morning woke me up properly. The words were , "The Munich Air Disaster. " not words I’ve heard recently and I have no idea why they were on the news this morning but they transported me instantly to my first year as a teacher.
Working in a boys school I had been given a class of almost 50 boys in their first year of secondary education. I cycled to school on that Monday morning, fully aware that the entire school would be upset. Several deaths had been reported whilst others were badly injured and were in hospital. When I got there the head master was waiting for me. I was the only female member of staff. He had assembled a class of boys and asked me to sit with them, not to try to teach but just be a mother figure to let them talk,and try to comfort them. Several of the boys had had contacts with the local football ream.
I sat on a desk at the front of the class and let them talk. Some of them had lost distant relations but it was amazing to see the grief very evident in that class room This was repeated throughout the school...no attempt to actually teach them was made on that occasion.......the entire school was upset and grieving.
This morning I am quietly amazed to recall just how upset the entire school was...but more how many ties there were with various managers, and teams around Manchester...
It’s not something I’ve thought about for years...but it was real...as a young teacher it taught me much about giving sympathy to the grieving. Something I’ve had to do quite a lot over the years.
Just talking and allowing those who are grieving to talk is something I’ve had to do several times over a life time....but that first one stays with me still. "Rest in peace." has never had such meaning since...but allowing people to express their grief openly has always been important to me during the rest of my life....
1 comment:
I think that grief doesn't necessarily have to due to a personal loss. We can feel grief for those affected by such disasters, and when they have had a meaning in our life, even if by association.
We've had a fair amount of bereavement in our parish in the past two years, new widows who need and deserve our support and just listening is often the answer for them. I know, when my younger sister died two years ago, the listening from my than Vicar and many others was a big help, as was the listening from my spouse and SD.
Those of us who have a support network around us are fortunate, we know that we have people to turn to. I am always aware of those who don't have that support network and are left to mourn alone. We do our best, but sometimes our offers of help and not taken up. We always do our best to refer them to people who can help, such as local bereavement services, but they are no substitute in my view, for a community of loving fellowship who can listen and offer practical support with small kindnesses along the way.
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